Unfortunately, this was one of those dates where I wasn’t given the opportunity to touch and spend some alone time with the subject matter. Because the subject matter was a trophy that was locked up behind a glass case. But then, it’s the Barclay’s Premier League trophy we’re talking about.
As a football enthusiast who is more than willing to trade any body parts of mine in exchange for a managerial career in the English Premier League, I’ve deemed it a sin to not get up-close with the BPL trophy should the chance bestow upon myself. When I heard about the trophy tour pulling over in Malaysia, I wet my pants out of excitement (not literally). It was like a divine endowment from some football goddess that I’ve been sub-consciously worshipping. Finally, she heard my prayers. Yes, there is a football goddess okay? Dammit, don’t argue with me, please.
So on that fine Sunday afternoon, I was at this little insane mall called One Utama where it was so crowded and the crowd could be described in the very popular Malaysian context ‘as if the mall got gold like that'. Seriously, it’s like everything there no need pay money one (an alternative description about a thronged mall in the words of an ordinary Malaysian).
After spending quite an exorbitant number of minutes trying to find a parking lot – yes, this is another bitchy obstacle one would have to face when visiting said mall – I went for a quick lunch at a Thai restaurant. Unfortunately, I’m not gonna talk about my lunch because a leprechaun jumped out of my car trunk and threatened to cut off my vocal cords if I were to divulge any details about my meal in this very blog post.
But he was a nice little man though. True story.
And finally, the moment all of you are anticipating, the tale about my endeavors of meeting the BPL trophy. Applauses are not compulsory, but it’ll substantially beautify your love life in the future if you were to applaud right now.
Here’s the obligatory, customary and inevitable photo of the main entrance. It’s actually a written statutory obligation for every blogger to show a photograph of the venue of the event he attended. Refer to section 6 sub 2 of the Photos On The Activities That Occurred (POTATO) Act 1958.
Whilst waiting for our turn to enter the makeshift gallery, my sister got so amazed with an angmoh dude because she had never seen one of them before. She had heard and read so much about them though, but never in her entire life, had she met a real one before. Being the good brother I always were, I offered to take a photo of her with this rare commodity.
Upon entering this chamber of English football pride, we were given a treat to see some of the memorabilia by some very renowned footballers in the English Premier League which was totally unexpected. Things like, a pair Petr Cech’s glove.
Chelsea’s pair of safe-hands since 2004. Till today, Cech is still selflessly and loyally serving the Blues, with of course, a reported £90,000-a-week salary slapped on his forehead.
There’s also a signed Lampard jersey.
And then there’s the dude that comes with the signed Lampard jersey.
A jersey that was signed by the Arsenal squad.
Signed Manchester City kit.
A pair of T90 that belonged to Rooney.
As well as the Craig Gordon and Paul Robinson’s used gloves. I’m not too sure if they were in fact used, but being a football junkie, I would place my complete trust on the notion that these are indeed worn by the respective owners. Applaud me for my faith, thank you very much.
Oh, by the way, here’s a photo of me standing alongside Brade Hangeland, Per Mertesacker, Robert Huth and Chris Samba. No biggies, I stand beside them all the time. Just that they never knew my presence all these while, that’s all.
A little point to clarify here, they are not that big as they appear to be. It’s just that, well, I’m short as hell. Okay? Case closed.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the one and only Barclay’s Premier League trophy!
Puke rainbows if you wish, because I did.
And now once again, ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the one and only dude that comes with the Barclay’s Premier League trophy!
Heh.
In all seriousness, I’ve never been more satisfied as a football enthusiast to witness one of the world’s greatest football award. Apart from meeting the Chelsea F.C. players and the Champions League trophy experience last year, this is another great football story that my children’s children will hear from me.
And of course, they’ll also hear that one story that was totally not made up about how my sister saw a white man for the very first time.
