This Blogger Hates Me A Lot!

Hmm, I didn’t know my previous post was so herculean that it led me to a rain of vulgarism and profanities assault. I’m proud to say that someone started a hate site – and made me the star of that site.

Unfortunately, that particular site has been deleted. It’s not much of a site. It was temporary Blogspot that goes by the address vincentsuckballeatshit.blogspot.com. Whoever that was, thank you for making my day and presenting me with an opportunity to compose this very post.

I saw the hate-site this morning. And let me tell you, the entire site only has one pathetic article, an article of approximately 500 words with 75% of swearword. Mind you, our little hater only knows about 5 or 6 expletives and those words kept repeating itself through out the article.

Dude, if you really want to cuss me, do take the decency to conduct some research, discover some new dirty words and then only you shoot. The f-word and the s-word is so overrated, people are using it so much nowadays that it’s not vulgar anymore. Besides, vulgarism just doesn’t excite me in terms of offensiveness.

And really, there is no need for the deletion of the site. I know you do not possess any fortitude to confront me face-to-face or at least reveal your identity. So your existence has no slightest significance in my life. And it’s your freedom of speech, even if you chose to abuse it like some immature cretin who abuses the 999 hotline.

I guess the fella saw my Tweet this morning. I said ‘some bloggers is gonna get hurt real bad’. That’s why his testicles retracted and being a wuss that he is; he deleted his site immediately. Or change the page address. Or whatever.

And I even find it smart to assume that it was a temporary site created by the subject of denunciation in my previous post, Mr. Rich. If it’s really you, it proves that you have fallen into my trap, sucker.

On another note, there is another blogger who made an opinion on my previous post in his blog. Don’t worry, he did not objurgate me. He is a good guy. He made a remark about my post on his blog.

Well, Mr. Cars+Technology|FOLLOWTRENDS, I couldn’t seem to post a comment on your post, so I’ve decided to run it on my own page.

Of course I agree with you that it is possible to earn RM6500 per month for a fresh graduate. Never doubted anything on that point nor arguing that a RM6500 income for a graduate is virtually impossible. Have you actually read my post properly before making an opinion?

Mr. Cars+Technology|FOLLOWTRENDS, don't always online and do nothing useful too.

Hate me, bite me, curry mee. I'm hungry.

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Make RM6500 A Month, Possible?

Not frightfully long ago, I chanced upon a website that recruits ‘traders’ with a promise of a handsome monthly income – RM6500. That is, with a great sense of concordance by most of the young people in Malaysia, a lot of moolah.

Attracted and enchanted by this very lucrative remuneration, I contacted the ‘recruiter’ to gain further information about the ‘trading’ business. The recruiter seemed like a nice guy. He offered to meet me so that he could explicate how the business really works and how I could be making that RM6500 as publicised.

We met up twice. Had altogether a few hours of amiable chat. And I can proudly conclude that this is just another multi-level marketing bullcrap.

The moment I declined having any further connections with this business, the ‘recruiter’ became desperate. He struck up all sort of conversation to regain my confidence. As convincing as he may be, I did not bought any sort of his bunk.

And if you’re expecting names, unfortunately there is none. I’m pretty aware that it might lead me to an unnecessary lawsuit in the name of defamation or whatever fancy legal terminology he and his lawyer might use against me.

However, I have a very strong hunch that the ‘recruiter’ will google my name. And of course, this very weblog will be the first search result. How do I know? I’m pretty much a moderate ego-maniac – I google my name once in a while.

Starting from this paragraph, the ‘recruiter’ will henceforth be addressed as Mr. Rich. And Mr. Rich, you know who you are. And if you’re reading this – which I’m pretty sure you will – the following are solely for you. Absorb every word I scripted, and do not hesitate to use the dictionary when necessary. And by saying so, if you concede that I’m insulting your vocabulary arsenal, you’re goddamn right I am.

Mr. Rich, not every scholar will turn out to be a sucker who works for a non-scholar. Yes, your self-advocated theory that all university graduates will somehow or eventually work for a fart that doesn’t hold a single tertiary qualification, is completely ludicrous and blatantly absurd.

You claimed to be a first-class graduate from a top-notched university. You also claimed to be one of those pathetic university graduates that work for a boss that do not possess a diploma. You further claimed that you were not paid accordingly during your working period. But my question to you, Mr. Rich, is every single university graduate out there receiving the same treatment as you?

Are you implying that being a university graduate who works for other people instead of starting their own businesses will lead you to a life where you can never succeed? You do know that you are making a very dangerous stereotype based on your not-so-well-to-do past. And I cannot imagine how many working graduates out there you have offended should they come across your inspiringly scornful ‘theory’.

Mr. Rich, you said that you have a very big network of down-lines. You said that you’re income every month is obscenely decent. You said you own a few properties across town, 3 was it? You said you basically have a life with no financial vexation at all. Again, my question to you, Mr. Rich, why are you so concerned about me not joining your network?

Don’t deny. The moment I said I do not have any further interest in your business; you emitted a wave of anxiety. Under normal circumstances, should you be a rich and successful businessman with no worries at all, you will extend your palm to reach mine and tell me ‘it was nice meeting you’ followed by us walking in our own directions.

But you did not. You frowned, a very swift one – barely 2 seconds. You tried harder in convincing me. You came out with all sort of cock and bull story about how I’m dumping a lifetime opportunity, about how I might end up as a working graduate with no powerful financial ability and how I’m wasting my youthfulness.

All of the sudden, what, you became my father? Oh heck, even my own father is not worried about me getting a meagre pay when I come out to work upon graduation but you my friend, is worried. Who the heck are you now? The chairperson of the local council for young-people-who-are-potentially-getting-a-lousy-paycheck-when-they-graduate? Why are you worried that I don’t get a decent pay in the future? Is it any of your slightest beeswax that I fail my future?

Very obvious reason. You need me so that you can make your money. You need me or else you can’t go on with you rampant purchases on properties. You need me to be your sucker. Yeah, if you truly wanted me to succeed, you won’t ask me to pay RM5000 to you in advance so that I can buy some never-heard-before-products and reap profit out of it; you would have drew out your chequebook and wrote me a big cheque.

As for the product, God you are good at making it sound like it’s the best damned thing after Avril Lavigne. It was an ordinary bar of soap and you were able to make it sound so divine, so heavenly and so miraculous for one moment I thought Buddha was talking to me. Products that were able to cure facial and health problems that even expensive medical treatments couldn’t? Wow, is it a piece of rock from heaven’s waterfall?

If it was so great, why are people still falling ill to those problems and doctors still making their money treating the former? And more importantly, why isn’t it sold over the counter in pharmacies? Not a single pharmacy sells this mystical product of yours. That is really weird. Since you professed that your products are so perfect, wouldn’t you make bigger bucks if you were to sell it in stores instead of ‘recruiting’ agents to sell it for you.

You know, Mr. Rich, I admit that I was really intrigued with this business when you first talk to me about it. But that level of enthusiasm fell when I started to conduct my own researches about your business. What kind of businesses have so many unsatisfied stakeholders? Just a simple search on Google and I can actually find numbers of forums and blogs expressing their dissatisfaction on your business. In fact, I couldn’t find any sites that were ‘saying good things’ about your business, except for those fanatical agents of yours.

Lastly, when you are reading this, kindly give yourself a slap because at the moment where you are feeding me lies and false hopes in order for me to sign up as one of your fanatical agents, I was actually returning the favour. I can honestly tell you that about 90% of what I told you through out our conversation were pure lies. The same kind of lies you flooded me with

No, it’s not true that I’m in very bad financial condition. No, it’s not true that I do not have much money left in both my bank account and wallet. No, it’s not true that my father is a small manager in some relatively insignificant company. Whatever I said that made me sound like a pathetic little dude, you may very well discount it.

Oh ya, I forgot to tell you this, I’m working my way to be a lawyer. Yeah, I lied once more when I told you I do not have any big dreams and I just want to make money. The truth is I have a dream so big that it could be your nightmare and the money, I don't give two hoots.

So don’t come talk to me like I’m some hopeless brat who is definite in failing my life if I do not join your stupefied business or attend any of your senseless conventions. Don’t devalue me if I choose to work my own life that is contradicting to your personal beliefs.

You are not qualified at all to judge me, you son of a bitch.

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Thanks To Nuffnang, I'm RM200 Richer!

Remember this little rap I wrote some time back? Yeah, Eminem just called me yesterday to tell me how much he loved my rap and wanted to do a remix version of it with me. And we're doing it with Elton John.

Just kidding. You know me. I'm so good at making things up that Oxford is considering replacing the word 'liar' in their dictionaries with my name.

Anyways, the following is genuinely not made up.

That rap of mine just won me RM200 courtesy of Nuffnang!

Yeah, I'm just shamelessly reaping traffics for my green little blog, y'know how hyped people will get when they see a post title that relates the word 'Nuffnang' with either 'cheque', 'buffered ads' or just plain 'money'.

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Importance Of Blogging

Never underestimate the power of blogging and tweeting. It just takes a few bloggers to blog about the same topic, tweet about it and let others re-tweet. Within hours, it will be the hottest news in the entire blogosphere. Yes, bloggers were the ones who actually discovered gravity and we tried to advocate on the theory. Issac Newton so happen has a more convincing story.

Attended a special screening of ‘The Social Network’ yesterday courtesy of Nuffnang. If you think I’m going to write a few paragraphs of meaningless reviews and spoilers about the movie, well, be very grateful that there is none. The only word I can use to describe the movie is ‘facebookbulous’. A very impressive movie, I say.

There are some arguments that social networking and media – blogs, Twitter and Facebook, precisely – is slowly taking over the world and that there is a heavy reliance on social networks and media by people all around the world nowadays. This is true only to a certain extent and under certain circumstances.

Although blogging serves as a platform where people broadcast information and comments, that doesn’t mean the reading of newspaper and magazines will cease (online newpapers and magazines included as well). Blogs will never be the mainstream media i.e. replacing newspapers, books and magazines. Can you imagine if you have to read the daily news on vincephilosophy.com? You’ll turn into a goofball within a matter of days, or even hours for those who are mentally weaker.

However, blogs are vital secondary opinions. You see, we can’t be reading newspapers all the time and digesting only what the newspaper provides, unless you are my grandfather. Truth be told, some newspaper journalists are really capable of writing horseshit and have it published on their dailies according to my dad. He was so pissed that he once burned down every single newsstand that sells that particular newsprint.

Nah, just kidding. He just switched his subscription to another daily. That’s all.

I do share the same view as my dad too, especially in the sports section. Some sports journalists really have no foggiest idea on what the heck they are writing. They even gave me a hint through their articles that they actually wanted to write a fashion column so badly but Vogue didn’t want them. This is where blogs come into the picture.

Blogs are capable of providing opinions on a certain issue in a different light. Yes, some opinions might be heavily biased and partial, but don’t forget, you are not limited to only one blog. There are virtually hundreds of blogs out there that provides their personal commentary on the particular issue you are interested in. You just have to filter out the different views of every blogger who had opined on that issue and decide which one is constructive and which one is bullshit.

And I admit; mine is utter bullshit. So don’t rely on my opinions too heavily.

Blogs can also provide information that no other mode of media can. There are some blogs that provides people with the latest electronic gadget reviews, comprising of the gadget’s price, specifications, pros and cons as well as a personal commentary on the gadget. And there are also some blogs that provides people with the latest sex scandal, comprising of photos, videos and some meaningless text copied from Wikipedia. Now let me see newspaper and television do that.

And again, my blog has none of the above, sorry to disappoint those who are anticipating such contents on vincephilosophy.com.

I don’t see myself as an expert in the field of blogging, but I do know what the douche I’m talking about. That’s the whole big idea of blogging. Bloggers will blog about something they are passionate about and has a working knowledge of his or her subject. When a blogger is enthusiastic about what he is blogging about, the contents and opinions will possess a certain level of quality. Although factual evidence is not emphasized in blogging, but who cares? It’s the opinion that matters.

A blogger is not legally bound to have evidence for every piece of opinion that is posted on his blog. There is no law against having an opinion as a matter of fact, unless that opinion leads to detriment suffered by some other parties. Those opinions are popularly called ‘libel’, ‘defamation’ or sometimes ‘national threat’.

Seriously, if having an opinion was a crime, I think my opinions will garner me a death penalty.

All in all, blogging is like having unprotected sex. It can be very productive, non-restraining and fun, but at the same time, it may lead to unnecessary and unwanted consequences. Be a wise blogger and play safe. A community message brought to you by vincephilosophy.com.

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Woman With 33 Husbands

Well, to be frank, today was one of the shittiest day in my entire life. It is even shittier than that time I was knocked up by some random guy I met at a bar and got pregnant.

Nah, I was lying. I didn't get pregnant. Nor slept with some random guy.

But the day was indeed shitty. But it's a story for some other day.

However, I was slightly amused and managed to cheer up a little after reading this really hilarious piece of, uhm, thing. Well, I was arranging some old newspaper that were on their way to the paper-lama truck and this page got me.

Yeah, for some queer reasons, my eyes caught this small section in a matter of microseconds.

"Wife of the 33 miners trapped..."

Holy char keow tiau. 33 husbands eh. It's already bad enough to have 1 husband. Imagine this lady had to endure 33 man in her house who does nothing but eat, sleep and fart. I pity her. Tthey say it's not easy to be in a polygamy. This lady, my friend, is in 8-and-a-quarter polygamies. I pity her once more.

Well, of course I know this is just a typographic error and that we're not suppose to make fun of the trapped Chilean miners. But heck, I just love to be rebellious.

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My First Month On Twitter

You know, presidents and prime-ministers have this practice of marking their 100th day in office. They will go around telling people what have they accomplished since they took on the throne, how much they love their new job, how much people love them, how much money have they swindled. Well, I'm doing exactly the same thing today.

Okay, not literally the same. But more or less.

I'm marking my first 30th days as a Twitter user! I know this is lame, but, nobody complained when they had to listen to Pokemon characters yell their own names continuously through out the whole series. That was so much lamer.

So, hereby I list a few of the tweets that I find shareable.

"This is the customary meaningless redundant first tweet. Uhm, so I'm suppose to say something like 'Hi, I'm new here?'"

"Awww come on guys, I only signed up for twitter, I did not shave my pubic hair and auction for charity. No need to be so stunned :P"

""Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country.” J.F. Kennedy. Er, what we do ah? We pay our income tax lor"

"Hijacking someone's twitter is called tweetjacking. Hijacking someone's facebook? Facejacking? Sounds funnily dirty though."

"They say red colour brings good luck. Nonsense. Look at Liverpool now."

"If re-tweeting is annoying, they should have just replaced it with a 'Like' button."

"I don't need to have sex; exams have already screwed me up from the rear."

"I want to have a career as a lawyer; but my dad got me a job as a billionaire. Shit la! Hate it man!"

"Travie McCoy's new song after the success of 'Billionaire' - Billion hair: I wanna grow a bit more hair, so freaking bad.."

"Super glue: RM4; Proton logo: RM20; Lancer: RM130k; Paste a Proton logo on a Lancer with super glue and call it Proton Inspira: PRICELESS"

"Malaysian football pundits and commentator only know how to talk rubbish, just like the politicians."

"When I say FML, it means Finally, Malaysia has it's own Lancer."

"Watching Glee doesn't mean I'm gay. It means I like to see angmo fella sing song."

"It's November already. Time to write my new year resolution for 2010."

"For the record, I'm not short; I'm only biologically challenged."

"Justin Bieber actually has like way more followers than Jesus Christ. What has our world come to."

"I'm so narcissistic that I sing a love song to every mirror I walk past."

"When someone asks you "where do you come from", it's not wise to answer "my mother's vagina"."

"#confessiontime I'm Asia's Justin Bieber who had a bad haircut."

"Similarity between billiards and golf, we poke balls with our stick into tight holes. Difference, sticks and balls for golf are expensive."

"Q: What's the difference between a battery and Malaysian politicians? A: The battery has a positive side."

"I've found a more polite to cuss - by calling someone a 'male child of a female dog'."

"My love for billiards is like Lady Gaga's love for weird ass costumes."

"Next time Proton will have a new car that looks exactly like a Nissan Fairlady. And we will name it Proton Wanita Adil."

"I finally know why Kaka isn't preforming as well as before - coz he is not the best looking dude in his club anymore."

"They say love is blind. No wonder my friend broke up with his girlfriend after he regained his vision."

"Joey Barton actually has more criminal records than the number of goals he had scored through out his footballing career."

I had a pretty exciting 30 days as a Twitter user. Let's hope I have a prosperous Twitter life ahead! Gong Xi Fa Chai!

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