World's Coolest Intern

Well, apparently I enjoy writing somewhat rhythmic paragraphs of verses and I’ve decided to make full use of it. I shall use this self-proclaimed talent to land me a job as the World's Coolest Intern. Alternatively, you may check out Nuffnang's version of it.

Well, seriously. It is the coolest job one can ever imagine. You will be given a six-month period of corporate training on social media – which means your job is basically Tweeting and Facebooking. And the best part is, you’ll be paid handsomely. And trust me, the pay is really handsome. Just like Brad Pitt.

Anyhoos, ladies and gentlemen, I give you my creatively-crafted job application form.

I Am Your Coolest Intern

Now these are not just lines of nonsensical crap,
It is basically my own CV written in the form of a rap,
You can read it with some rhythm and perhaps a few claps,
Because I will be the coolest intern you will never forget.

My name is Vin Tsen and I am 18 this year,
It is pronounced as Vincent and just so you’re clear,
I think I’m the coolest intern because I do not know fear,
I will be able to adapt and survive in any atmosphere.

I heard being an intern is never an interesting game,
But I’m not keen in buying any of those ridiculous claims,
I am all out to be Standard Chartered’s coolest intern will only one aim,
That is to gain a heck of a lifetime experience and perhaps a tad bit of fame.

I think I’m cool enough for several reasons,
I’m young, ambitious, energetic and simply pleasant,
If you think I’m bored of life, well unfortunately I haven’t,
I’m more than ready to take on life with the greatest enthusiasm.

I am curious with how the world look from the outside,
I’m not afraid to take it on even if it may prove to be a rough ride,
Like how people always tell others the grass looks greener on the other side,
I want to have a taste of it myself and achieve some own sense of pride.

With Standard Chartered’s offer so irresistible,
It is really impossible for me to look at it and fumble,
As a young man with a burning passion I am anything but feeble,
Can I be the coolest intern, the answer is of course I am able.

Social media is one thing that I’m pretty familiar,
I blog and tweet on a daily basis just like my every other peer,
Spending so much time on the computer as if it’s my full-time career,
If I’m not selected to be Stan Chart’s coolest intern then that is really peculiar.

Vincephilosophy dot com is my humble little blog,
The layout is green in colour, the same one as Kermit the frog,
The contents are self-created humour and it’s not quite a shameful flop,
The traffics are pretty satisfying just like a farmer collecting his full-grown crops.

I do tweet as well and it’s a pretty new hobby,
You can tweet me through my tweet-name @vincephilosophy,
Yes it’s exactly the same as my blog address so remembering it is easy,
Twitter is the last thing I say good-night to before I cuddle my blankie.

I hope my little intro had given you the best entertainment,
I mean come on, who introduces themselves with a flow of rhythm?
In all seriousness I assure you this as I clench my confidence in firm,
You will not regret having me on board as the world’s coolest intern!

-End-

Well, I sure hope my magnificent piece of work will land me the coolest job on Earth. And as a bonus, I shall throw in an amateur video of myself rapping. Kindly forgive the amateur-ness. It was sort of a last minute idea and there’s this thing called deadline that I have to abide by.

*Forgive the thumbnail on this video, it's beyond my control, blame YouTube, seriously.*

Once again, apologies for the poor video quality and the absence of loud, vexatious and annoying overrated techno music. And yes, I know I look terribly vain in the video, don’t have to remind me about that. Go ahead and laugh.

But I will have it remade and remixed should I be chosen to take on the role as the coolest intern.

Wish me luck people! :)

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Rap For A Famous Blogger

Well, he may not be as celebrated as KennySia or as bimbotically sarcastic like XiaXue, but he sure is renowned among average joe bloggers like myself. Who is he? He is Spiderman.

Just kidding, he is none other than Kenwooi actually, the rwidely known blogger who owns a striking orange blog. I don't know why he disapprove the idea of being regarded as a 'famous blogger'. I mean, come on, a steadily large number of traffic and a obscene number of comments for every blog post, you are definitely a famous blogger, Ken, don't shy shy lah. :P

And recently, he had made a request on his blog. He wanted readers to write him a testimonial. Selected ones will be featured in one of his unannounced 'secret project'.

Within a matter of days, the number of testimonials posted actually outnumbered the amount of chest hair I have. Some more say you not famous ah, Ken?

Of course, I did join in the fun and posted my testimonial for him. Unfortunately, I had a little too many things to say and exceeded the allowed number of words. So you won't see my 'testi' being featured in his secret project.

Yeah, I like to call it a testi. It was a term widely used the olden days that referred to 'testimonial'. Remember the good old days when Friendster was still ruling the internet and people will actually laugh at you as if you are some zombies from the seventies if you have no foggiest clue on what Friendster actually was?

In those Friendster days, people use to post 'testi' on your profile page, which is known as the 'wall' for you freaky Facebook people who is seeing and hearing about 'Friendster' for the very first time. Yup, that was the time when Facebook was actually a book made of paper.

So, here is my 'testi' for Ken. Decided to run it on my own page since it will not be in Kenwooi's 'secret project'.

Kenwooi dot com is da place,
Second coolest site after the book of face,
Receive higher ratings than the Amazing Race,
You’ll really ROFL if you catch kenwooi’s pace.

Kenwooi dot com isn’t just for fun,
It will make you laugh until you cannot run,
With all the simple words and the funny puns,
It’s almost impossible and crazy if you do not un.

Kenwooi dot com is all about humour,
All so damn hilarious your brain will grow a tumour,
But don’t worry it’s not cancer nor a disease in your femur,
It’s just swelling coz you laugh until your head knock the monitor.

Kenwooi dot com is full of parody,
All written for the sake of sheer comedy,
His ideas, effort and commitment is so thoroughly,
I’d rather read his blog than listen to Jay Chou’s melody.

It is stated the word limit is only fifty,
But I know you know kenwooi is not so thrifty,
Testimonial with 50 words only where got pretty?
I want to write kenwooi dot com the best ever testi!

Well, try saying this out quickly and loudly. It kinda gives you the sensation of rapping. Damn, I'm good at writing shitty rap lyrics. Enjoy and peace out people, coz your daddy Vince ain't no chillin' out with y'all no more. He's got some shitty exam shit to sit for. FML.

P.s. The 'FML' above doesn't refer to the obscene term that requires one to fornicate with himself/herself. My FML here stands for 'Finally, Malaysia got it's own Lancer'.

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I Did It! Follow Me!

Well, remember I've once blabbed about why I didn't want to sign up for a Twitter account? You may unduly forget about it for I've once again flawed my own reasonings.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have my own Twitter account now!

And here's the best part, you can be a follower of it! My my! Isn't that good news? Oh come on, a little applause and champagne popping won't hurt.

I've decided to adopt the monicker 'vincephilosophy' for my Twitter account for a wide range of reasons.

1. 1. For the very obvious reason, it happens to be my blog address.
   
   
2. 2. None of my full-name is available. Yes, that includes 'vintsen', 'vintsengan' and 'ganvintsen'. I'm really curious how many other screw-ups out there has the same name as I do.
   
   
3. 3. I wanted to use the name 'vintsenissodamngoodlooking' but it's just too narcissistic.
   
   
4. 4. The nickname 'vincephilosophy' make me sound sophisticated.

Alright, do follow me at http://twitter.com/vincephilosophy or @vincephilosophy. Tweet you there!

p.s. I'm not a virgin anymore; I'm already screwed by exams.

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Singapore Property Website

Yes, this post is still about Singapore. I still can't exactly get over my one-night stay on the island. Although I have already been there for God-knows-how-many-times.

I'm always fascinated about the well-ordered lifestyle over in Singapore. Always amazed with how systematic their public transport are, always impressed with how minimal their traffic jams are and always awed by the elegance of Singapore homes.

Yes, I do have this sense of admiration for Singapore property. I always liked the accessibility and convenience of the houses in Singapore as they are usually near MRT stations or at least a bus stop that provides a prompt shuttling service.

Despite being in Kuala Lumpur - which is approximately 400 kilometres away from Singapore, I can easily view and browse through properties that are for sale through this convenient website called Propwall in the comfort of my own home. This site houses a library of potential properties, ranging from condominiums, houses, office lots, shops, factories and vacant land.

The properties that are being advertised are detailed in the sense that all relevant information are being scripted and published - at least most of them are detailed. Should there be any further enquiries, there is a small section at the bottom of each classified that allows potential buyers to contact the seller.

There is also a section specifically for Q&A. Users will be entitled to ask general questions regarding Singapore properties or they may even post specific questions on a particular piece of property they are interested in.

Well, as much as I love to own a lavish and classy condominium in Singapore, my current financial ability tells me that I can only realise my dream by logging on to Propwall on a daily basis and looking at the condominiums through my computer screen.

But for those who can financially afford a property in Singapore and have that deep passion to live the Singaporean dream, head over to Propwall now! :D

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My Virgin Homemade Video

Well, don't be misguided by this clearly misguiding title. There is no scandalous videos of amateur virgins in an uncompromising position with their lovers in a secluded and private venue whatsoever in this post. Which also means that there is no sex videos here for you people to jerk off to.

My 'virgin' here constitutes 'first time'. Yes, this is my first homemade video that was uploaded on YouTube for public viewing. In other words, I'm being a fame-whore. Just like millions of other narcissist out there.

I took this video on my recent stay in Singapore. You would have realised that I was mystically in Singapore few days ago if you had read this. *publicity stunt*

So ladies and gentlemen, I give you 'A Brief Introduction of Singapore'.

Kindly bear with the unsynchronized audio as my video editor had proudly screwed my video.

And 'A Brief Introduction of Singapore (Part 2)'.

Seriously, I should consider moving to this place called lamesville where lame people gather and die.

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Singaporeans, What Do You Mean?

Am at Singapore right now waiting to fly home to KL at 11p.m. Composing this very post from the comfort of my hotel room by tapping an unsecured wireless network that goes by the name 'Thomas'. So, Thomas, whoever you are, thank you for being so generous.

Well, will be having my first Cambridge A-Level paper tomorrow. Law. And here I am spending my time hitting on the keypads of my laptop. This ignorant act of mine is generally unacceptable among scholars who will be sitting for exams. According to the flow of normality and social acceptability, I'm suppose to be revising my ass off now.

Which I am not doing. I'm not studying now. I'm blogging. I think if there's a statute that provides for the contempt of last-minute-revision-one-day-before-your-exam, I will be charged right now for not studying right now, one day before exam.

Anyways, I'm pretty much amazed with how systematic things are around here in Singapore, how people actually follow rules and the utmost minimal level of traffic jams. Well, for one, Singaporeans can't use the lame Malaysian 'traffic jam lah' excuse when they are late for work/school/dates.

However, there's this few things that I don't quite comprehend. But it's nothing major, really.

Firstly, I wonder why you Singaporeans have this great interest for Mitsubishi Lancer. Everywhere I go; I see Lancer. It's the same kind feeling every Malaysian has when he walks on the street of KL and everywhere he go; he sees Proton.

Why ah? Did Lancer became Singapore's national car? Or it's just too cheap?

And there's thing about the train system - or proudly known as the MRT by Singaporeans. I simply love how punctual the trains are. This is something my home country, Malaysia should learn and practice.

Besides, the trains themselves are clean, spacious and comfortable. Something Malaysian trains lack of.

But hor, I don't quite understand this annoucement that is being aired at the platforms,

"Report any suspicious person or articles to the officer on duty" (Something like that lah)

The thing is, how a 'SUSPICIOUS PERSON' actually look like har? How you all differentiate between a 'suspicious person', a 'not-so-suspicious person' and a 'definitely-not-suspicious person'? I really wonder how Singaporeans practice their discretion when taking the MRT.

Is this suspicious?

This?

Or this?

If it was me, if I see this fella walking about on the platform, I will definitely report him for being a suspicious person. See his face and long legs also know he is here to play a fool.

I vow that I am not in any way making fun of Singaporeans, or am I?

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My First Press Conference Thanks To Nuffnang

Disclaimer: This is not usually my style, replacing words with photographs of hunks who are absurdly superior in height, but, what the heck.

Attended the Westports KL Dragon's press conference last Thursday under an invitation extended by Nuffnang. It was a typical press conference where men clad in suits and always busy fiddling their Blackberry were invited to give speeches accordingly.

With Robb, Jestina, TianChad and Joshua.

It is a formality for me to list down the sponsors for this basketball club, as I had undeniably ate a slice of Papa John' s pizza and a couple of Krispy Kreme doughnuts, courtesy of the organiser.

"Apart from SOX as the Official Telco Sponsor, the other sponsors involved are Westports Malaysia Sdn Bhd (title sponsor), Berjaya Corporation Berhad (Main Sponsor), Glocomp and Privasia (Proud Sponsors), Gatorade (Official Sport Drink), Xballer (Official Sport Brand) as well as Media Prima Group and Malaysian Today (Official Media Partners)." - An excerpt from the invitation e-mail.

Well, the photos, as promised. And yes, I know I'm short. No need for the teasing.

Trust me, the ang-moh fella was standing on a bench. The last photo I'm talking about.

A-level's examination will commence on the following Monday. Sometimes I just pray that we run out of printing papers. Just pray.

p.s. A big thank you to TianChad of http://www.tianchad.com/ for the awesome photos.

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