Twitter

Back. Back from the solemness and despair. Happy, sad, peeved, screwed-up. Life's a bitch and it will always be. Just move along and everything will be perfectly alright. At least, that's what I think.

So, today will be about micro-blogging and why I don't micro-blog (is that what you people call it?).

Meimeiyen had been persuading me to sign up for Twitter. And did I reject her straight in her fetching face. Sorry girl, don't feel so disturbed about my snubbing. I'm not usually this obnoxious. Heh.

I know, I'm like one of the few weirdos around here who doesn't own a Twitter account. So I would like to make several justification for being Twitter-less.

For some peculiar reason, I can't seem to get where micro-blogging is suppose to head. I mean, I know its exactly like blogging, just that with much fewer words. For me, its an impossible task to shove every single thing I want to say in less than 100 words.

I'm an ass when it comes to writing. I die-die must compose a grandmother story essay when it comes to writing, or in exact terms, blogging. I find it really cumbersome to MICRO down my contents. Its like asking me to shit bits by bits instead of letting everything out at once.

And I'm not the kind of person who will get all excited when I see something that pricks my funny bone. You know, instead of blasting it out immediately on Twitter with your laptop/handphones/Blackberry, I would rather keep it running in my complicated brain and blend in whatever essence of humour I can before letting it all go on my blog.

Its like men, the older and longer they "keep it", the more screwed-up it will be. Essentially, I would prefer to stew something I witnessed in my head as long as possible before poking fun at it. I mean, the more I can rub on, the more screwed-up it will be. The more screwed-up it is, the more stupid I will look.

And if I start using Twitter, I have to start all over again by learning the ethics, hidden rules and taboos. Which I hopelessly loathe. I mean, what the devil is a hashtag? To me its a a tag that says "eat the crap outta me!". And usually worn by hash-browns.

And the follower thingy, its one big inconvenience for me. You see, I will trust almost anything I see on the Internet. If there was a site that says Adam Lambert french-kissed Obama, I will bloody well believe it.

Assuming I do Twitter, I will definitely keep up with whatever my followers are up to. In other words, I'll rely heavily on Twitter to know what's going on. Imagine if some scandalous tabloids were spread around, I will, in my greatest intelligence, believe it.

Imagine what a big boo-boo I'm gonna make.

Well, maybe I should jolly well stick with blogging. Maybe its because I come from the old school of blogging where long-winded shit looks cooler.

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